Do you realise that Ireland's senior citizens only receive free travel on public transport before 4.30pm? This is staggering news, friends. There was I assuming that they rode the buses all day simply to clog them up for everyone else when in fact, the only time they have to trundle around the country is before tea time! And people complain of a generation gap. If the pensioners were allowed to trundle around the country all through the night, I am sure we would see a greater demographic span in Ireland's pubs and clubs. And drinking is a cast-iron way of making people mix and get on with each other, I think you'll agree.
And old people are fun! Yesterday afternoon, a throng of grannies poured onto my bus from the Royal Bingo Hall on Collins Avenue.
'Can I see your passes, please ladies' droned the bus driver.
'Less of your lip, young fella, can't you see were ancient?' cried back a canny old hag. 'Yeah, we've not long left, love!' cackled another. Disrespecting authority and laughing at death in one go! I am speechless with admiration!
On another occasion, I peaked a glance at my elderly neighbour's reading material and managed [I say managed; it took her fifteen minutes to finish a page] to catch the following line:
'Despite the bruises he had given her, Sue felt curiously drawn to this tough hoodlum.'
Thrilling stuff. If you feel compelled to learn more about Sue's attraction to this hoodlum, I think I this is the book she was reading.
In short: Old people are okay in my book. Just as long as they aren't in front of me in the queue at the supermarket.
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