Hey kids, 'tis i your odd friend! Who is she, nobody knows! How did she get my email address, nobody knows! How is she today, nobody cares!
But, as a matter of fact, i am unnaturally fine today! Its almost six pm and though ive been up interacting with my fellow humans since eleven this morning, i have not once fallen, tripped, dropped anything or snorted unbecomingly with laughter! what is you going on here, you may wonder! I too wonder my friend. i can only construe that the gods are setting me up for a major fuck up for the tonight or tomorrow, therefore balancing my seemingly sudden powers of capability and competence!
But do not fear! Tomorrow i am going to work and i ALWAYS do something stupid there! They have this little uneven flight of steps that is just crying out to be tripped on.
A new addition to my newsletter is my letters page. As i obviously dont recieve any letters (that would imply someone caring about my welfare), i am including here the comments i recieved from my 'friends' upon announcing the launch of this publication. I have of course fabricated many of the comments.
**************LETTERS TO THE EDITOR***************
A newsletter about you? god you are so up yourself.
Aoife Horan, friend
Lucy, you are sad.
Grainne Walsh, friend
Cool!
Janine Whyte, flatmate
Savage! You are so mad!
Joanne Mitten, flatmate
Lucy, for Gods sake im the one paying for this f**king college course, do some f**king work!
Kate Murphy, mother
Lucy, you are so wise and clever, it is about time you shared some of your classic insights with the world.
Britney Spears, friend
Wow great idea man, you are so clever and shit.
Bertie Aherne, close friend
Thats 67c please.
Woman in shop, philistine
There you have it! the people have spoken! i dont think that bunch of gems can be contradicted now can they? Anyway, thats all from me, hopefully ill do something really really stupid on the way home and then i can reinstate the LUCY FUCKS UP column. I hope you enjoyed my ramblings- well not really. If you start enjoying them do tell me so i can charge you for them. over and out.
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